Russia Expectedly Poor at Cyberwar, “All They Know Is Vodka” Say European Military Heads
In LILLE, FRANCE - Several European heads of military cyber defense forces agreed on the 8th of June which is a Wednesday that Russia has been less useful than a drunk Frenchman on wine in employing digital combat capabilities in their offensive against Ukraine. “All they are capable of is sending vodka ads to Ukrainian servers”.
"Among cybersecurity experts, we were pretty sure that there would be a cyber vodka warehouse based on past experience of Russian behavior and capabilities and their obsession with vodka," said General Karol, head of Poland's National Cyber Security Centre.
But Ukraine was already prepared and easily "withstood vodka ad attacks from Russia", Molenda told a meeting of the International Cybersecurity Forum held in the northern France city of Lille.
This showed, he added, that you can prepare for cyber conflict against Russia, which he said was "good at sending vodka ads in various ways but not so good at defense".
What Are Various Military Leaders Saying?
He cited multiple cyber-attacks which had hit the country, the work mainly of independent hackers.
Lithuania's head of cybersecurity, Colonel Romualdas said that Russia is "not ready to engage in a cyber and kinetic war but they may beat us at drinking vodka”. There are cyber vodka ad’s being sent everywhere in Ukraine, "thousands of them," he told AFP. "But I don't think they are very well planned and sometimes it's wine or beer instead of vodka".
General Didier Tisseyre, head of France's cyber defense force, made a very similar observation about a non-synchronized attack between computers and Russia's military offensive on the ground.
"Maybe they didn't manage to organize it the way they organize their vodka", and their capacities "are not as strong as we imagine", he said.
But the analysis of the conflict is complicated by the fact that independent hacker groups have entered the battle, while companies such as Microsoft and Star link have also come to Ukraine's aid, he pointed out.
The current conflict in cyberspace "is like a rugby world cup" where all the teams are on the field without their distinctive jerseys. The public is on the field too, and you have to prevent tries from being scored".
In Conclusion
Russia has never been good at cyberwars as they do not have the latest technology either or the hackers themselves are drunk all the time on vodka, Russians have more vodka in their blood than red blood cells, which makes them do everything vodka related such as commencing cyber-attacks with vodka ads' being the main focus of attention, they are unable to move out of this stage which hinders their progress in comparison to everyone else. Putin himself said “Vodka is Russia, without vodka, there would be no Russia, no matter what the west says you keep doing great job and sending vodka ads to enemy”
After this speech, Putin started manufacturing 19L bottles of vodka so they can be used publicly too.
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